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Thank you so much for yesterday.
A “mind-blowing” experience in my little sissy-sub world.
Every piece of what happened was amazing.
I’m hoping to retain it long enough to write out the whole sequence of events….
I honestly didn’t really mean to start out as we did …
I always like to hydrate well before coming to see you and I find with a belly full of fluid, by the time I get to the playroom I really have to pee. Sometimes I have urgently gone into a small market immediately off the exit before showing up, just so nothing like what happened yesterday, happens.
But I’ve wanted to play with bladder control and humiliation for a while so I decided to hold it. That was my mistake. I was fine when I first said hello but as I lugged my sissy and play gear in, the exertion was too much for my over extended bladder.
I felt just a small couple of drops.
I should have focused more on controlling myself and I thought the small spotting in my new stretch pink pseudo jean leggings would barely be obvious.
But then my bladder, sending a restroom near, just seemed to develop a kind of its own. And I was feeling wetness and warmth in my pants and matching lace panties.
By the time I got downstairs I was quite a mess as you made sure to let me know: “look at you … a grown man … when was the last time you ever lost control like this? I was going to
Let you sit down on my settee but that’s not going to happen. Show me your legs … ohh it’s past your knees … I can’t even let you kneel … you’ve wet yourself that far. No, go into the shower.”
I was then given “corner time” in the shower but was not allowed to stand, instead I was ordered into a kneeling position facing outwards which put more pressure on my bladder and before I could help myself I was peeing my pants right before Daddy An Li. It was so embarrassing as you teased me about how pathetic I was and ridiculous to completely loose control of my bladder.
You decided to add to the mess and you hiked the slits of uour beautiful shear outfit with hinted at the shape of your exquisite nipples and breasts. You stood over me and lifted your leg and I knew what was coming as your hot piss drenched my pink shear tennis skirt I had so hoped to be stripped down to and play in, the one that exposes me because it is far too short for me … leaving all my holes open along with my ass exposed for all kinds of training and play.
You laughed which only further turned me on adding to my humiliation. Your laugh is both playful yet with a word spoken further speaks to my humiliation and diminished state, even more forcefully than your words.
I’m now sitting in your shower stall on the floor in the corner, my pants covered in my piss all of me now drenched in yours. You shake me from my state of wonderment, “how did this all happen so quickly?”
I arrived about 15-20 minutes ago and now I’m sitting folded up in the corner of the shower, the outfits I had carefully chosen ruined unsuitable for play and totally humiliated, which you know turns me on more than anything. Well actually much more humiliation was in store.
Never think it can never get any worse because then a few things happened that did …
I was ordered to wipe the shower floor clean of piss with my pants.
You walked out and I heard stirrings outside.
I knew you were up to orchestrating my next predicament but had no idea what was coming … which was exactly what I had requested in my email to you … to please keep me in suspense … off balance.
You’re carrying a sizeable red wine glass and a Brita pitcher … and it’s filled with water. The glass is full to.
In a voice, not to be argued with you say
“drink this.” “Faster!! Chugg it.” I down the water and you announce “ you’re going to be drinking this entire pitcher and it’s going to be going right through you,”. You smile that smile, knowing how evil you are, but also delighting in the setup that is coming.
With many stern admonishments I guzzled the entire pitcher. Then as ordered, stripped and showered.
One of An Li’s superpowers seems to be the gift of knowing an inner fantasy I have never shared with her, but which through her careful observation combined with immense experience she just seems to know where I desire to be lead in my ever increasing submission and experiences with her.
It has long been a secret fantasy to be made to drink a lot of water quickly because I know where that’s going to lead to. Not that water sports is my principle fetish but the humiliation and submissiveness experienced is, those desires are key to why I play and An li I’d ever full of twists turns and surprises.
When I came out, you had already gone through my stash of lingerie sets and picked out a two piece bra and matching combo panties-garter along with the stockings.
When we first started playing I might have protested and you would play the game and order me to put the lingerie on. Me making a show of projecting masculinity and feigning resistance to be dressed by you.
But that desire to be humiliated by having my masculinity stripped away is long gone and you have revealed this deeper desire to be feminized when we play, as part of the game, knowing further and even deeper humiliations and sensations are coming.
To be continued ….
You are amazing.
My nipples are sooooooo big
And sore
And sensitive and I want to touch them because it sends sensations down to my cock.
So it’s a conflict. I want to play with my nipples but they’re so tender and I feel like you are taking me further on a journey I am supposed to be going on with you.
Thank you!!!
w
ps I did not proof this. I just wanted to get it down
w 2.19.24
Hi!
I wanted to send a quick note of gratitude to you and to Io for a wonderful session today. It was so great to meet both of you and I feel lucky to have been able to spend the time exploring with y’all today. While I of course appreciated all of the fetish/kink stuff, I also wanted to let you know how nice it was that y’all did it with such a gentle touch. I felt so comfortable the whole time and you both were so silly and fun! I didn’t expect to come out of a pro domme session to be thanking you for being so sweet and kind, but here we are.
I’m so glad I had my first professional session with both of you. The bar is certainly set high!
Please send my thanks to Io as well. My mind is already spinning thinking of things to do next time, if you’ll have me!
j 12.4.23
She then started pissing in my mouth. It was one of the hottest experiences I’ve ever had and I absolutely have to give her enormous credit for making it so hot, for two reasons.
First, the superficial. Looking up and seeing her underside as she sat bottomless in the toilet chair was fucking great. Again, her ass looking way better than I ever had hoped based on pics and videos was a surprise. Her thighs and glutes, athletic but still full and supple, squeeeezing through the toilet chair at me were great. Her cheeks were spread, showing her lovely and tantalizing anus. Her *labia* just wowed me. Thick, mouthwaterly meaty and plump, wavy, hanging down, a much darker color than I would’ve expected, I was actually in awe for a second. The view through the hole in that toilet chair was a sight to behold, and it would get way better in a few minutes.
The second reason the piss was such a highlight experience was her, her demeanor, her command of the situation. After she started pissing, she stopped for a moment and got serious, telling me “if you choke and have to cough up piss, I want you to turn your head to the side, *this* way. And slowly. Let it out. Got it?” That methodical, practical communication and the commanding tone made my submissive brain tingle lol, and just made me feel like I was in the hands of an intelligent professional, a genuine Dominant, who was going to use her control to make this session fun and run successfully.
Then, there was her pacing, the way she ran the urine drinking session like she was a drill sergeant putting me through my paces, and a conductor leading a well coordinated orchestra. “Open up!” she said, and started filling my mouth up. Then, she stopped the flow, yelled “swallow!” then “open!” She did this cycle over and over again, she filled my mouth up, waited for me to swallow, and filled it again. The amazing part was how she’d wait the perfect length of time for me to swallow and catch my breath, but only barely, so I was able to breathe, but still felt this mounting pressure and slight fear like I needed to hurry up, struggle to catch my breath as fast as I could, and empty my mouth because she was ready to fill it again. It was the perfect rhythm to make me feel hungry for air, intimidate and scare me, but not starve me of air to the point that it interrupted the flow of the session. It was this onslaught of piss, merciless enough to overwhelm me just enough to excite, but allow me to swallow it all. She’s good at this.
Then the other thing was something I would’ve thought was an exaggeration if I’d read it in someone else’s review: her piss tasted *good*. It being my first time drinking piss, I was expecting it to be bitter and hard to drink. Any second now, I thought, this will start tasting really bad. But every mouthful went down easy, and there was even a very slightly sweet aftertaste, and I could’ve kept drinking and drinking.
After she ran out of piss, she sat there, blessing me with the fantastic view, as we chatted about life, she drank laxative tea to wake up her bowels, and took the occasional pull from her vape (she’d previously asked me if I minded her doing that). She casually threw in remarks about how she was going to shit in my face “like you’ve been wanting for so long”, surprising me by spontaneously spitting on me and the time she slapped me hard in the stomach and asked me if I was full of piss. We talked for a few minutes about all the meals she had eaten in the last couple of days, and she told me shed had some toast for yesterday’s breakfast with nut butter “and sometimes the flax seeds show up in my shit,” which we agreed I would look for.
Thank you again for an amazing, immersive experience on Monday.
You telling me how to come dressed to the session set up the whole experience for me.
I would like to continue this and wonder how to do it, far enough ahead so if you ask me to do something I have the right clothing to fulfill your command?
I would have never chosen to get dressed up in the Honey Birdette 3 piece lingerie set, stockings, a skirt, heels and my wig beforehand and drive to LA this way. I have only gone out dressed driving once before. And that was late at night across a short distance in little sleepy Santa Fe, NM where no one was awake.
As I drove down I-5, stroking my thigh his, feeling the sensuality of the touch and getting aroused by the experience of how vulnerable and exposed wearing a dress really is. How I can just reach up and it’s all there – so accessible and the power dynamics of being more exposed and vulnerable. I also liked the frilly ankle socks – pink – matching – which said “sissy.”
You have opened a whole new world to me of gender fluidity and I am more curious exploring being feminized, than before I started working with you. And for different reasons (other than humiliation) which was all I was interested in when I first started with you,
I saw my hair stylist two days before seeing you and she blew my hair out in a feminine style. I wore a female blouse to the appointment. Before seeing you I would have only dressed if ordered but now I’m curious about how I fit in the world?
I strongly identify as male yet when I dress I find there’s a whole world that opens up for me. Its like being a kid, lifting a rock and seeing a whole world of insects and life under the rock and being ever curious, saying wow!!! When I am dressed, women react and treat me so differently. It’s as if, I have been given access to a secret club. The women don’t see me as threatening nor are they as guarded around a cis male.
It’s always so interesting how our time flows.
I started showing you the bag. You see this harness ball gag that I mention really turns me on, but I can’t make it work. You’re putting it on me realizing there seem to be holes missing and you set out to put the holes in the strap. Before I know it, I’m strapped in this ball gag head harness and then you decide I need makeup.
The sessions are never linear, never following the most obvious path.
The obvious path, to put me in makeup first, then the ball gag harness but you do it the other way around. You’re applying the makeup aggressively but with a certain tenderness and attention to detail while I wear the harness joking about my predicament (humiliation by Daddy – yes).
You play off my moving to the music – I really liked the tracks on Monday – I was going to ask if this was a Spotify play list or your own? I start moving and you order me to strip.
Then I’m down to my sissy pink lingerie set.
Then I’m stripping – like a stripper dancing and I’m just in the pink panties.
My hands go in the wrist restraints and I’m immobilized overhead – stretched.
Vulnerable
Open
Available
This continues with my legs going in the spreaders.
Subspace:
What proceeded to happen with the weighted nipple play took me to the deepest sub space I have yet gone to in our play together. As you attached more weights to the clover clamps the pain overwhelmed my thinking brain. I stopped thinking in the normal logical clever way I have my whole life. Physical sensation overtook me. I was simply a physical being only aware of my physical body. Everything else disappeared and it took me to a place where I was more in my body and in your presence and the present than ever.
It made me think of times I have gone skiing, or played a musical instrument. Or talked in a foreign language. All involve speed – surrendering thought and acting from a place much deeper. There comes a point where my thinking brain says “wait a minute!!!” this skiing feels much to fast, these sixteenth notes are too fast, the French conversation is happening and I’m not thinking, and I stumble out of the activity and into my thinking mind and I tumble or trip.
But in subspace in a scene, there is nowhere to tumble or trip, it is only seeminly endless overwhelming physical sensation and so my mind just stops thinking because there’s too much coming all at once for me to process.
I also found the light touch on my pectoralis region part of the overload.
I think this is key.
I want to do this again so bad, I want to do ass play, I want to explore impact play and do so many things. Now I know, with intense experience, there needs to be counterpoint, the light sensual touch. Even now as I write I am turned on.
As the weights came off you decided time to shave the nipples.
You found some “sissy-scape” hair clippers you did not know you even had, and I was losing another vestige of my male identity, my chest full of “man hair.” I love having my hair removed.
Once when I was with my ex-wife we went together and had me completely waxed and it was so hot. I was so far gone in subspace from the pain and light touch involving the nipples and it was such a strong desire I was only all the more turned on.
My life-partner (who knew I had the session with you and has given me her blessing) has told me she likes my man hair. She comes home from a trip Friday and it will be an interesting discussion.
But I also think its an entrée to a discussion about my changing sexuality she and I need to have.
I was and am still so incredibly turned on by everything that unfolded.
But the sub space was incredibly intense.
Can I go there with you again soon please?
[…]
That ends my session experience. Again – T-H-A-N-K Y-O-U
[…]
Please feel free to share any of my bloviating (I think this word predates “blogging”) if it helps you.
I like to help Daddy 😊
Switching gears: I watched your video on Soft White Underbelly.
you came across as you are, strong, confident and smart.
I thought the questions were too broad and played on stereotypes.
I thought the questions could have gotten more specific to explore beyond the cliches once you called him out on that.
Recalling childhood experience and the subsequent kinks and sexual interests that will develop in response to that history: Ester Perel said in her first book, show me someone’s childhood and I’ll show you their sexual interests (or something akin to that).
I wanted to say in response to your comments you made about yourself that you’re not empathetic and robotic:
it has not been my experience with you.
I find when I am with you, you are totally present making it up as you go along.
I feel strong connection though I am very aware, having been involved in film and TV for so long that maybe you are very skilled in playing this part, and its something you easily shed like a skilled actor does, when you or the actor goes home. People get confused and think actors, say Gal Gadot is Wonder Woman, Harrison Ford is Indiana Jones, but these actual people are not their characters. The character and the person are distinct entities. They are skilled actors who make us believe for two hours that is who they are. But it is a fiction.
Whether you are acting or otherwise, I feel your connection with me when I am with you is genuine and I feel you’re very aware and very empathetic to how I’m experiencing what you are doing.
I also understand our roles and our boundaries, and I respect you for being so clear in who you are and there are lines you don’t cross.
Sent with kindest regards and appreciation,
w 7.12.23
Just want to you say I appreciate you! I’ve been thinking about it and I think one of the main reasons why I enjoy sessions with so much is due to not feeling guilt or judgment afterwards I feel like I’m always in the perfect headspace while in a scene with you but afterwards you’re very personable and social which allows me to feel comfortable. In retrospect you’re the only domme I’ve sessioned with in which I don’t feel guilt/embarrassment after.
My life is very vanilla and stereotypical on the outside in terms of work, bars, gym, dating, and parties for the average 26 year old male which forces me to keep this interest as locked away as possible but with you I feel comfortable.
I look forward to many more sessions!
s 3.26.23
Hi, good morning!
I wanted to pass on some pictures and my gratitude. I know how much work goes into a scene and I really appreciated how much of my notes you incorporated – trying electric play, giving me opportunities to succeed/earn praise, a variety of impact play, restraints. I’m not sure how much is your genuine preference during a scene, but you never made it feel like I asked too much.
I am still shocked (ha) at how much the violet wand hurt, especially because I did some more googling after and it seems to be pretty mild for a lot of people. But it burned! It felt like a rubber band on fire, and it wasn’t consistent in the way impact was, which is what really contributed to me losing it I guess, it would zing more or less. It probably doesn’t seem like I kept my composure during the impact play because I was crying, but I still kind of had it – I did lose it entirely with the wand. But even though I was genuinely frightened I did feel a lot of trust, still.
As we’ve both noted now, pain is not a physically pleasant sensation for me, but it is therapeutic. Putting myself through something like that and coming out the other side feels awesome, even on top of all the endorphins. So thank you. So much! For the luxury therapy. You were an amazing, beautiful, sadistic, smart, fun Daddy.
I’ve included some pictures! I couldn’t get them to show up well on camera, but I also had scratches on my chest from the gloves and small dots from the wand down my torso.
Thank you,
j 1.9.23
An Li:
Thank you again, for our time together again.
You asked for thoughts and I wrote them out while fresh.
Please excuse typos, or something I may have forgotten.
At the end of our time, it will be experiences, more than anything else, which defined the journey.
Too often I have put my sexuality behind other needs, other pursuits. Today was so powerful for me in starting to explore things so long only fantasized about or explored only through partners who do it out of love but no interest in the play.
I really appreciate the way you kept me off-guard, surprised by each piece that came next.
Starting with the end of our time together: The way you dressed, then modified me – tying the bottom of the men’s shirt like a girl, rolling up the sleeves put me into a “grey area” not CDing but very obviously femme. Even more obvious if one looked observantly and also saw the bit of Spanx that showed – a bra / breasts? not pecs underneath the shirt.
The women at Stockroom all smiled when I walked in the door and their reaction to me -seeing me dressed as I was – turned me on. On the way home I had to pee and get gas and I ended up in Spectrum Shopping Mall where I wandered in to a Lulu Lemon store – the female associate asked if I needed help as I passed by women’s yoga pants and was looking up at them, which also turned me on. I got a weird look from some bald headed muscle dude. And it was interesting to experience that too. It was liberating and fun and humiliating and everything that turns me on. The dress was enough to say “not a ‘real’ man,” “possible sissy” but not too much as to get me into trouble. I had this sense you would do something when you sent me back out into the world and it would have the right balance of not being too much.
I would be curious to continue to play with this progression and to attach it to “games” as we did today.
Thanks for keeping me “off-base” not answering the email about my session thoughts. At first I wondered, did she get it? Then I felt like it was a little odd, uncharacteristic as you had been so communicative in response to everything else. But then I realized this was going to be on your terms. And that was powerful. I’ve been reading Esther Perel’s Mating in Captivity and she talks about how great-sex is all about the unexpected, surprise, mystery: it was all there today.
In that same regard I was initially surprised you did not cut off the clothes from my body; except underwear – loved the way you teased me as you did, “just a little piece of cloth that’s all that defines your masculinity.” “There it goes.” : )
Loved the incorporation of role reversal. How I was the one going to be objectified today. Versus me checking out women – objectifying them. I wonder if play might someday involve going to a yoga class – dressed – the one observed?
Admired your sequencing of the whole session: from clothed to barefoot to naked to feminized – Putting me into the bra, panties, then woman’s Prana yoga outfit. Once feminized – – utilization of the stocks for my head – I don’t know why – it just turns me on so much being in stocks like that being gagged – you telling me you were tired of listening to me; writing on me; Daisy Dukes; nipple pay, and the final ass play.
Being in stocks – – so humiliating.
The leather bindings you put on me allowed more flexibility creating unknown possibility; but hope some future scenario I will be humiliated bent over immobilized head and arms in stocks. Ass thrust out totally exposed for your use.
Maybe not even the next one – but someday … ?!?!?!
In many ways I felt you could just read me.
Putting my legs in spreaders, made me feel so vulnerable, exposed, helpless.
Could I please explore this more in our future scenarios?
Which lead to your cutting up the clothes.
Doing it in front of me was so very powerful – with me totally immobilized – can’t do anything.
But the biggest surprise was when you cut up the jeans and turned them into Daisy Dukes.
I couldn’t believe it because I had NOT!! mentioned that, but I had fantasized about you doing exactly that!!! … to my jeans. Thank you for then making me model them and adjusting your “tailoring” to reveal even more butt cheek.
There was a part of me that “secretly” yearned that this was how I would be sent out into the world at the end of our play today. To be dressed in a pair of cutoffs that had my ass exposed. Really feminine, Daisy Dukes. I almost wish there could have been two pairs of jeans one made into Daisy Dukes that I had to wear when I left and another that were ultimately destroyed as they were. Choices …choices!!!
I wonder now, if at some point, I will be made to bring another pair of jeans for destruction now that you know this secret desire of mine? And whether there will be certain requirements for the jeans you will destroy next, or they will have to be women’s jeans???
Now going a bit out of sequence …
I really enjoyed everything that was done to my nipples.
The clover? clamps were a little painful at first and then I was surprised by how quickly I grew accustomed to them and then surprised, I kind of forgot about them. Even when you took them off … the pain was not as bad as some home clamps I have worn. I would be curious in a session what it would be like to start to with the clamps we did today, then a tighter pair? Or is two clamps in one session too much? I realize too, today was about learning more about what I can and can’t handle.
And to say it … I acknowledge and appreciate how you took it slow and erred on the side of caution while still creating and amazing experience – thank you
The nipple suction devices – – It makes me hard just writing that.
I want to touch myself.
I would be really curious in exploring with you modifying my nipples further?
What would it be like to do even more suction – make them bigger.
I find the idea of big nipples and aureoles such a turn on.
Especially with all the teasing regarding how I now had bigger nipples than you.
That’s an example of teasing that is so effective for me.
I liked how you teased me for losing my position as an entitled man, not so powerful anymore …just a sissy … etc.
At the end when you saw me sweating in the Spanx and said “not so easy being a woman is it?”
The teasing throughout was perfect!!! Perfect!!!
I felt very put in my place, humiliated, submissive.
I NEVER felt like you crossed some thin-fine line though and became mean or abusive – It felt like we were playing and I loved your entire verbal way throughout – more — please – more.
Coming back to my nipples – Really surprised by how sensitive my skin around the suction devices got – totally unexpected. I felt weak in the knees as you ran your nails over those regions and it felt wonderful.
Also out of sequence – really enjoyed the body writing.
Loved your drawing penises all over me.
Again the teasing oral and body writing really pushed buttons that turn me on.
Curious how, longitudinally, this stays fresh?
There’s a side that would like you to write all over me every time and yet, I wonder does it lose its impact if done too much?
I liked the game of being made to hold the dildo in my mouth.
Again the teasing, “I (Daddy) don’t suck cock … you (w … wendy??) sucks cock … and you like it … don’t you.”
And then the game requiring me to suck the cock to hold it in place – turning me into your little cock sucker. I couldn’t believe the time I dropped it! There was a side of me that wanted to lose again but I’m so darn competitive and determined. When I think of all the hard things I’ve succeeded at in life, hanging on to a cock …LOL …
One suggestion might be, if the first challenge you gave me is proving too easy … what would it be like to receive a second challenge or to make the first challenge harder?
Although I must confess, I was surprised I managed to hold on to it once the ass fucking started.
Having the dildo in my mouth and ass – and being teased by you about that – pushed so many of my buttons and I felt a shift inward – like I had gone from the guy who walked through the door to a true sub.
I’ve done ass play but I’ve never experienced anything like that.
For years now I have heard about “going into sub space.”
But it was when you started to fuck my ass, stick your fingers up there and then fuck me with the dildo, that I truly felt I had a chemical, energetic, life changing experience and for the first time in my life I really experienced “sub space.” I was drooling (also humiliating). The sensations were so intense and I just wanted you to keep pushing me and stretching me open, but I also really liked how:
1.) you really warmed up my ass and played and stretched it so it did not feel painful, it was a really natural progression for me;
2.) I felt we stopped at a good point.
3.) I crave more touch and teasing on my g-spot – even now it turns me on when you found it and teased me about it.
Coming back to warming up my ass – stretching it out slowly really made me want to take more, versus other experiences where I have not gotten adequately warmed up and it really causes me to clench my ass, tighten up working against the end goal. My experience with ass play today, really great.
The final and in some ways most powerful moment was when I latched my feet onto your thighs and was thrust you into me and thrusting myself onto you. I had been fully converted from a straight male to a total sissy and actually craving and thrusting myself onto your cock. I felt totally topped in that moment. I thought about what it might be like someday to have a forced bi session with Daddy. I also wondered what it might have been like to have allowed me to wrap my legs around you and fuck myself on you as another option in the future.
My whole body is still vibrating from everything we did today.
Thank you for such an amazing experience.
I’m sure there are things I will want to add and say but I wanted to get it down while it was still all fresh.
And just to say it again, I realize that’s a lot of energy on your part An Li to orchestrate and track and sequence and transition us through all that – thank you – really masterful.
Coming to my first pro dome session, I was, like Daddy described in her blog post, “a nervous beginner.” By the time I arrived I already felt I was in good hands given the professional manner she conducted everything leading up to our first session. The last of my nervousness soon evaporated as she made me feel comfortable about my desires, leading me deeper into my submission.
w 8.22.22
Hey, just wanted to follow up and thank you again.
I had so much fun and I am so glad I took the leap and went forward with the session. I’ve been very on the fence about in-person sessions, but you were so friendly and professional and made everything so fun and easy. Also, your attention to detail is top notch and I promise it does not go unnoticed. I hope you had some fun too and hopefully I wasn’t too nervous and awkward lol. If there is ever anything else I can do for you as far as reviews or references please let me know! I already can’t stop thinking about what we’ll do next time!!
j 8.13.22
Dear Professor Daddy,
Lots of thoughts and feelings about BDSM 101 and the practical exam – I will just throw words against the wall and see what happens.
Surprisingly there was no anxiety and little fear! My Anxiety rabbit disappeared in a puff of smoke! The weekly tasks were very beneficial in giving me direction – buying and using sex toys, researching costuming and food stuffs. So my arrival at the dungeon had become normalized as another task. My main concern pre-session was that my janky car would crap out on the freeway!
I had complete trust in your expertise, skills, and care for me and held an inquisitive excitement about what you had in store for me. When you opened the dungeon door, it felt like I was meeting an old friend and mentor, even though we’d only met once before a couple months ago. Binging your clips and texting with you frequently has made your voice, appearance, persona as something very familiar. The session felt like a collaboration, rather than my stereotype my conceived notions of an antagonistic D/S relationship, and that the final performance was that day!
In terms of pleasure, I most enjoyed the anal play/pegging. One thing I’ve learned is that I’m a complete anal slut! Before, I had homophobic feelings about butt play which I can better articulate now with my anxieties over gender and sexuality. I’ve often felt “queer” (strange/different/minoritized) but also confused because I was not particularly attracted to men. Now as I come into my non-binary identity I can better acknowledge a desire to feel more womanly while also being attracted to women. Anyhow, I like things being shoved up my butt.
In terms of pain – yeah, you did have me on the brink of Mercy with those kitty claws! It was unnerving feeling them penetrate the skin of my ballsack and the little pop upon removal. Otherwise, I handled the punches and etc. fine and could definitely level up on the roughness and pain next time – let’s add some corporal and CBT next time.
Found fetish? I have complex feels about the Roman Showers. That was clearly the strangest, weirdest thing that I’ve ever had done to me and that feels like a great accomplishment! Boner issues notwithstanding, I was most aroused by you standing over me, swigging soy milk and puking red liquid on me! One: I really think I just like that feeling of a towering (Five foot) woman looking down over me. Two: that was a moment of worship and a desire to continue serving you! I looked up at you in admiration as you discussed the taxing nature of the act while nonchalantly performing it with ease and professionalism. You had excellent accuracy spitting and shoving food in my mouth. That’s the moment I saw you as a boss, my Big Daddy! When you’d shove your hand down your throat to wretch, I did really feel like a robin being fed by their parent “Aw, this person is willing to play with me by doing something extremely weird with me because I kindly asked and paid them to” I need to think/experience more this power/consent dynamic. but yeah, you puking on me is a significant event in our relationship. Yes, mark it on your calendar, you stole my heart when you repeatedly puked on me!
On a practical level, Was it gross? Hella gross? Did it look gross? From my perspective being unable to really see it, it wasn’t gross. When I craned my neck, all I saw were chunks of fruit and red liquid. It also helps that we were eating the same food, so the smell, taste was all familiar. Also, because I planned/bought everything? I’d consider being in a hella gross WAP video.
I was more inquisitive and interested in what was happening rather than being horny, which was unexpected. Perhaps because it was my virginal BDSM experience that I can only compare it to porn? Further, I’m still learning about what actually turns me on through experience. I am indeed a lazy sub, I just wanted to lay there to feel things and have things done to me!
[…]
You are an intriguing person – a kind, generous sadist, an expert in her craft. You have a remarkable range of clip videos and you express yourself well on your website – I enjoy reading your bloggy style! I definitely want to continue having a relationship with you, playing around and experiencing new things. At the same time, I am now enjoying my newfound freedoms. I do feel this generalized sense of rebirth from all my experiences and changes I’ve undergone these past few months.
[…] I was paralyzed with the endless possibilities of a non-binary identity when we first met; now I’m looking forward to explore the person I now am.
You are in a period of transition as well, with your recent move and travel plans, so let’s keep things loose and easy over the summer with our random chats. Please do let me know when any Bay Area trips are in the works so I can enroll in BDSM 201 – let’s step it up! I’ll try some corporal this time.
Thank you, Daddy!
xo j 6.12.22
Hi Daddy,
Apologies for the delay in getting back to you, but I still wanted to provide some after-scene thoughts like last time.
I was really happy to see you again and overall the experience was good once more. I think there were some mutually exclusive pluses and minuses compared to our first session.
What went well:
Your inventiveness around how you tied and suspended my balls was great, even though I had sore leg muscles for days afterward (perhaps that was a good thing?). I continue to revel in how well you use props and physics to your advantage. The next day I wondered why my sinuses were sore; I quickly realized it was due to your repeated sitting on my face. I also had a sore neck for several days – nothing too bad and nothing I would consider to be an issue – more that I had nice memories of your tormenting. You pushed me at certain times and as I said at the end of the session, at one point I felt genuinely terrified yet still knowing that I was safe. Well done! You knew just the right level to push.
I also felt a good connection with you conversationally, which I appreciated. I didn’t have the energy drop I had the last time post-session which was lucky for me as I had to work late until the evening after I saw you. And If my read was right, you seemed a bit more comfortable around me as well.
[…]
[…]
I’m looking forward to seeing you again in […]. I’m interested if you have any initial thoughts about what we could do in terms of birthday celebration/torment. I’m not ready to book an actual session day/time yet, but I’m curious to hear any thoughts from your evil and inventive mind while we look to build a plan closer to […].
Thank you again.
Respectfully,
s 3.20.22
An Li,
Eventually, at some point after the session, I stopped shaking.
Some part of me still feels surprised I went through with the whole experience, but I’m more than glad I did. From start to finish, it was phenomenal and I’m not just talking about the session itself. The emails were detailed and written in a very professional manner and the phone calls really put my mind at ease, especially the second call.
As for the session itself, I felt so safe and secured the whole time in your hands. And after stripping and telling me to kneel and you basically saying “it’s not a big deal”, I felt a huge sense of relief and my mind finally relaxed (even though I was still shaking throughout the session). But before I knew it, I was tied to the bed and being shaved! Definitely did not expect that (very kind of you!) and I’m still getting used to how it looks.
I also didn’t expect how much I enjoyed being roughhoused (my chest remembered you for a couple of days!). You have a knack for saying the right things at the right time; we actually shared a few laughs, which was great. Safe to say, the session made me feel sensation I’ve never felt before. But of course, the 3 hours just flew by (another knack of yours).
More importantly, as amazing of a Dom as you are, you’re an even better person. It was great to meet you and I can’t thank you enough for everything. I wish I had conveyed some of this to you after the session but I supposed my mind was just swimming with all sorts of thoughts. I mean I could have stayed another 20 minutes easily just talking about the MCU.
I’m thinking about doing this again in September. 🙂
Thank you,
a 3.11.22
Hi –
I just wanted to thank you for such an awesome time on Friday.
I know we’ve only played twice so far, but I’ve really enjoyed the energy, fun, empathy, joy, and sheer kink competence that you have brought to our sessions. I feel super comfortable that you are seeing me, I know I’m going to have a great time, and I appreciate how you can push my thresholds some but read me well enough to not go too far.
I’m very much looking forward to more chances to play in the future.
Respectfully,
b 3.8.22
Hi Daddy,
I wanted to check in after a few days post scene and give you my thoughts:
Overall it was a fantastic experience and I’m so glad that I reached out to you. You were comforting when needed (with our pre-play discussion and after play discussion during cleanup), and then assertive and powerful within the scene. I was not expecting the eye mask but it was a great addition to the scene, and made me feel more in tune with what you were doing when I was focusing more on the non-visual stimuli. Your dialogue and verbal interaction with me was perfect and I felt a combination of being Dominated as well as being looked after. You made me laugh at certain points which I appreciated, as it made the experience more enjoyable and natural for me while still feeling underfoot. Your Dominance felt absolute, not that that was ever in doubt.
The ball tying (and then being put in the winch!) was the highlight for me. I knew that your inventive mind would come out and I couldn’t have imagined a better result. The sounding was a new experience for me and it’s something I definitely want to try again. My only regret here was not having any photos taken for me to reminisce about later.
[…] You were patient and weren’t angry when there was spillage, and I’m grateful that you deferred punching my balls to just twisting them as punishment.
[…]
Thank you again. I am really appreciative and grateful for the experience.
Respectfully,
s 2.8.22
Hi mistress,
I have to say this is one of the greatest times in my life. I was so nervous before I walked in, and that almost completely disappeared after we did a little chat. When you first said “kneel” to me, I realized: I’m mistress’s slut, I belong to her now, I follow her orders, there is no need to be nervous at all.
I was so happy and felt very fulfilled when you took both of my anal and fist. Sadly we couldn’t do more fisting because my asshole was sore. And I did underrate myself for the smothering play, definitely able to hold longer. I really want to worship daddy’s butt again if I may.
At last, thank you for teaching me more about anal play. It’s my honor to serve a mistress like you. Hope I can see you soon. (I know there’s tons of grammar and sentence mistakes in here, I really want to say thank you for giving me this wonderful experience, please don’t punish me hard next time🥺)
k 10.30.21
Hello Daddy,
I wanted to give you some feedback from the wonderful session we had. Words can only describe so much of what happened and how I feel about it, but I’ll do my best to convey my thoughts and emotions.
Honestly it was amazing, I was expecting going in to be in pain but you brought it to a whole new level. But it was more than just the ballbusting, the environment, your attitude and the pacing was masterful. You brought me to a level I could not have achieved on my own, You had me laughing and giggling along with you with every hit!
Going on to more specific aspects of the session. The predicament bondage was an intense start but it was a good indicator on what was to come. Being stretched out in just about every direction, whilst the hoist keeps my balls nice and taunt made me feel truly at your mercy the rest of the session. I need to work on my flexibility so you can have more to work with next time.
Afterwards lying down with my limbs chained down and everything exposed, I became excited at how vulnerable I was. The clamps were painful, but having them constantly rearranged due to “Mr. slip dick” made it really feel like torture. But I also had no idea just how painful tying up balls could be. Then untying and retrying them unleashed even more blissful pain, having you make me howl and having my balls stretched and poked was eye opening to say the least. All whilst you fingered and plugged my ass, a sensation that was quite different from my little experience. I wanted to try more anal stuff but time didn’t allow as Ball kicks were next
I hope you enjoyed being the first to kick my balls, I certainly did. The ball kicking was just about my favorite part of the whole session. All the tenderizing that came before just enhanced this part. Even your warm up kicks hurt a lot, but even as they got harder and harder I loved every last one. I hope the kicks didn’t hurt your feet too much.
Then the kicks from behind, what a lovely position to have your balls kicked. Being able to see you take aim with your feet and making me jump just about anytime there was a long pause made each kick mysteriously painful. I think you nailed each kick in this position, I wish I could have taken more.
Then the finale, the alternating cock and dick slap. At this point I was mostly done, you had thrashed my balls and made me giggle in pain for so long I wasn’t sure I would be able to handle 10 more followed by an intense squeezing. But I’m sure glad I did, it felt like a big accomplishment that I was able to push through those hard slaps. And better yet I was rewarded with the hardest squeeze my balls have ever felt.
All in all I loved the friendly environment, it was like we were exploring ballbusting together. Seeing what I could take and pushing my limits all with a smile on your face made the whole session absolutely fantastic.
I think I finally understand why it is I love ballbusting so much, it’s not for the pain or the feeling of submissiveness, which don’t get me wrong, are great feelings in their own right. But, I enjoy ballbusting most when it is done by someone who really enjoys themselves doing it, someone who has fun doing it and shows it. Watching you kick my balls with a smile on your face and laughing made it all much more enjoyable. The fact that I fit into that chastity cage in the end was a miracle.
10/10 would book again.
…
Thanks again for the amazing experience
A 9.7.2021
Hi there. S here.
Just a quick note to say again that it was totally thrilling meeting you and playing with you. I so appreciate all the time you took – over email and in person – to understand my kinks, interests, and limits. And the actual session was amazing. The moment when I finally truly surrendered and begged you to keep fucking me was, for me, completely organic, humiliating, and insanely pleasurable all at the same time. A lifetime of memories in a single 90 minute block of time – soon to be repeated, I hope.
Until then, be well.
S 5.27.2021
Hi An Li,
Thank you for the amazing session yesterday! I’m happily enjoying the post-session soreness in my butt, back, and chest. I’m still processing everything that happened, but here are some post session thoughts:
I loved the purple cuffs in the beginning and was really into your nails running across my upper back after you had flogged me a few times– I’m super sensitive across the base of my neck down to my upper back and loved the sensation.
I was really excited to be tied up and was thrilled to be forced onto my tippy toes as you attached the spreader bar to the ankle cuffs and loved feeling the sensation of the rope in my mouth. The suspense that built up as you slowly brought the violet wand up my leg into the more sensitive parts of my inner thighs and into my genitals was exhilarating. The prickling sensation of the wand was both nerve wracking and exciting.
Moving to the face down position on the floor was even better and I loved the sensation of confinement from the tightness of the bonds around my legs and my arms. I really wanted to keep the strap that went over my mouth, but kept letting it slip as I was getting spanked. I really appreciate you readjusting the tie after it kept falling down.
When you brought out the tens unit, the feeling of helplessness was intensified even more. I really enjoyed the contractions created by the tens unit! It was really strange to experience at first, but it definitely grew on me as the session went on. I loved kissing, licking, and sucking on the heel of your boots and was ecstatic when you left the stilettos in my mouth as you went back to torturing me with the violet wand.
Getting zapped on my sensitive bits as you increased the intensity of the tens unit and forced my legs to stay open with the pressure of your bare feet was electrifying (pun intended xD). I loved every moment of it and the memory of it came back so strongly that even as I was trying to jerk off post session I kept flinching, expecting to feel a zap or spank each time the pleasure built up.
Your use of spit throughout the whole session made me feel increasingly powerless and I loved feeling the sensation of the saliva lingering on my face and in my hands– especially when you told me to close my hands and hold onto it as I was getting spanked and smacked by the heart shaped paddle that you dipped into the spit on my hands and proceeded to smack me with after letting me know it would hurt more with the spit on it. That paddle hurt like helllllll, but I wanted to take more and more as you mixed in pleasure with the intense bouts of pain.
I really enjoyed crawling toward you after being on the floor and helping you put on your boots– I definitely need more practice learning how boots work xD, but I loved getting to see them and experience them. I dropped super deep into sub space when I felt the weight of your boots on my chest as I was lying underneath you and still have sore spots on my chest where they were– I loved being your foot stool and am honestly super curious what it would look like to have a session with more human furniture play– especially combined with bondage or the sensation of weight in ways that challenge the shapes my body can hold.
I especially appreciated your attentiveness throughout the whole session. I recently realized that I’m a survivor and often struggle with intimacy– especially sexual intimacy (even when I’m by myself). Your responsiveness and consideration of my interests, needs, and boundaries, as well as the periodic check ins throughout the scene supported my sense of safety with you throughout the whole session and has helped me better understand how to somantically hold the complexities of my own trauma with care, connection, and intimacy. Thank you for holding space for me. While I have made a lot of progress in being able to connect with other East Asians, I still struggle with opening up, so being able to connect with you as a Taiwanese person was really healing for me and I truly appreciate every chance I get to connect with you.
With much gratitude,
k 5.10.2021
Dear Mistress An Li, S 5.27.21Thank you for such an outstanding slice of life filled with mystery, adventure, p&p, and horror.
Legs were shaky until late last night and woke up today with pain in unexpected places and even in places I didn’t know existed! Tapped the right nipple and it’s still sensitive 24 hours later for some reason! Super loved the hot, extremely tight inescapable finale. So intense. So blissful. The upward angled, upside down dangling was scary too, and I was teetering on the edge for a while, and nearly tapped out. The relief was incredible after all those positions.
Appreciate the pictures and am happy you had some enjoyment playing together too. Safe travels and good luck on your journey in the Bay Area.
p.s. So very glad to see a kind and nurturing side too. Don’t worry, I won’t tell anybody.
Highlights:
-getting my balls tied, you showing me them turning purple
-whenever you smiled and acted “sympathetic”
-talking about popping my balls, castration, etc.
-really just everything you said, totally amazing. you got right in my head and seemed super “real” 😀
-At the beginning, when I was on the ground and you squeezed super hard, and I swear I could feel your fingers moving inside my balls. I know that’s some literotica medically-unsound nonsense but it felt AMAZING
– really squeezing is just my favorite i think.
– and slapping and punching
– also i can’t believe i didn’t mention this but the classic “your hands on my shoulders, you knee me in the balls while standing”. i forgot how much i love that
Lowlights:
-wish i could’ve gotten hard/cum, i know that’s the least important part of the session but i was hoping.
-using the safeword irresonsibly. i know better to trust you now, i wish i’d gotten over it during the session. I do think some of the swinging might’ve been too hard, but I might change my mind on even that once the pain goes away.
-also saying “no limits” on the form LMAO
-not asking you more questions and talking after. i was so charged up i could barely think (and i’m shy in person, a lot more than online). I wish i’d asked about what other ballbusting stuff that you haven’t taped, about the torsion you caused (for totally educational purposes…), just like…idk, talked to you. i could barely think after, definitely something I want to work on in future sessions.
Stuff I learned:
-I can’t cum while on my knees :/ laying down, sitting, standing are ok. (not that i get any say in this! just what i learned about myself)
-When I’ve busted myself I’ve gone hilariously lightly -squeezing, kicking, punching are great! tying is terrifying but you made it fun, and really did a lot more than I thought was physically possible. but oh my lord the swinging was painful. not as much as the last kick though >_<
-You’re back in town at the end of January… really considering booking again if possible, but realistically I want to wait until my balls get back to a vaguely round shape before making that decision. Kinda in a tender state of mind ATM.
i know you probably won’t respond to a wall of text after i’m done paying but writing all this up makes it easier for me to remember, and I never want to forget this. Thanks so much!
s 12.22.2019
Mistress,
I want to Thank You and Mistress Lucy Khan for a wonderful morning on December 11th, 2019. I was fortunate enough to serve two dominating and beautiful Mistresses who guided me through a full toilet session along with slut training. It was great to know that I felt safe while at the same time was enjoying being used and abused and to do what was told of me. I do feel bad that I failed to fully consume your feces, and next time I will have to do a forced consumption, so I do not spill it out on your carpet. I could never be worthy of you nor Mistress Khan but I hope I will be with you two again soon, in near future, and have round two!!!
Thank You both for the amazing night last week. The marks are sadly fading – may be gone by tomorrow. But they lasted almost a week and were painful and uncomfortable for a good four days. My cock especially had beautiful multi-colored stripes (purple bruising, red welts, black scabs) that provided such a wonderful vivid reminder of our time.
An Li – You have clearly risen to the top for me, not just in number of sessions but more importantly in depth of understanding of my kinks. You brutalize me like no other. I grow more in awe with each session. Now You can add to that introducing me to a friend with whom I was able to develop an instant connection! You asked when I was prone on the floor at Your whim who was the most sadistic pair I’ve served and I said it was You Two. Now with the benefit of distance and time I confirm that it is indeed, and it’s not close.
[…]
There were many moments that stood out. The ball chariot course was the most elaborate and difficult I’ve experienced and was just so fun. The simultaneous cock pinchy device and hard back whipping was a dream. I’m very curious about revisiting that horrible cock tie thing that I immediately safeworded out of
[…]
But the jumping jacks and burpees stood out as one of those unique moments where I truly appreciated the creative genius of my Dommes unfolding in real time. I’ve obviously experienced ball weights; I’ve fantasized and seen videos of forced exercise (though always found such videos unsatisfying); I’ve seen and fantasized about “starting the count over” in many scenarios; I’ve actually never even fantasized about tiny clothespins INSIDE my cock; getting my cock whipped is one of my favorite standbys. But to experience ALL those elements combined in such a cruel way was crazy and something I had never imagined. I was living what could have been that ultimate fantasy video I reference when I’m describing a scenario I want to a Domme. I felt so helpless and broken that I was somehow relieved that I accidentally bumped An Li in the face (sorry!) leading to a punishment of 21(?) awful whips to the cock – which ended up being in my top 3 cock whippings of all time but somehow a welcome relief? WOW.
The other especially memorable part was the ridiculous sequence of ballbusting – rubber mallet, kicking, stomping, and Bettie just squeezing and twisting me to “Mercy!” multiple times. And the expression on Her face as She did this, backing me into corners or chasing me across the floor was crazy cool! Indeed the stuff of nightmares!
[…]
An Li – I am regretful and sorry for not providing You the kicks You were craving. You did a great job of patiently pushing me to a few more at a time but I obviously ruined the finale by safewording […]
Did I mention that You are also incredibly funny and a joy to talk to? “I’ve hated dicks for a long time”; “What else is he going to say?” (in reference to me complimenting the corset); interrogating me for passwords; a conversation with my balls via boot phone; and that “joke“ that only You Two found funny: punching me in the balls. (I feel like I’m missing at least one more really good one but can’t remember it.) LMFAO!
Thanks again for the wonderful time and I look forward to serving again. I’m so lucky You exist.
What an interesting week! To first recap our session, that was super intense. In a session, I usually have a few episodes, totaling maybe 20 minutes or so, of “oh shit – I wish I didn’t need this level of pain to get off because this is awful.” Last week I felt that way for literally half the session. And yet as You know I’ll keep coming back for more. That moment of “almost feeling sorry” for me on kick #2 was so telling of how sadistic You really are – it felt horrific and the fact that You could deliver that and still want to move on the next 13 made me admire You even more. #6,#8, and #13 were similarly awful. I don’t know if these stand out to You or You are blissfully unaware. At least #13 probably stands out because that was when I puked. Pushing me to those final two after that was crazy and cool – though I suspect You actually had a moment of weakness at the end as #15 was mercifully light. The ball kicking is the part that really stands out – my balls have remained black for a week and the bruising spread to my cock and lower stomach in subsequent days. There’s still one area that remains pretty severe – the area that the steel toes were connecting with on the direct hits. The soreness and aching has also kept You on my mind almost non-stop. I can’t stop thinking about how much You hurt me and how much I appreciate You for this. That’s not to say that the ball whipping before that, and the playing with needles in my cock after were not also painful and intense – both were up there in my catalog of painful experiences but they were swamped by that kicking! Speaking of, your “Feel like a woman” tweet was so genius – maybe Your most popular tweet since the great dick nailing. I was simultaneously so happy to be involved in it and so jealous to not be tagged in such a popular tweet! Sorry just the whiny attention whore side of me coming out 😀.
[…]
z 10.29.2019
Hello An Li,
Thank you for taking the time to see me. You are truly amazing. I thought I knew what to expect but was really taken aback by just how beautiful you are! I’ll say that again, because I’m not often, actually, never have been stunned by how beautiful a woman is, but YOU are truly beautiful! There were several times during our session, when I looked up at you, and was stunned by just how beautiful you are. I wonder if you knew….
Your feet are perfect. That can not be displayed on a website, but, my god! They are perfect! I wish I had been able to concentrate better, to worship them as they deserve.
I also noticed your legs, and amazing ass. Holy shit! You don’t know, but I displayed EXCEPTIONAL self control and did not caress your amazing ass! WOW!!!! What I’m trying to say is, top to bottom, you are BEAUTIFUL!
I also noticed your attention to detail regarding my session wish list. Your work out attire was perfect! Your ability to role play, ad lib, and be creative is top notch! I was truly impressed, and happy. It’s obvious you have a great mind to go along with that amazing body, and beautiful face!
My nuts are still extremely sore, and swollen, but I have this vision of you leaning over me, and how incredibly beautiful you are, and I’m more than a little bit happy.
I hope we can play again soon. I would like to get to know you better.
Thanks!
b 10.8.2019
Hi An Li,
Hope all is going well! I’ve been thinking about our session a lot, but was having trouble writing a follow up email. I suspect this is because seeing you forced me to see myself. For the longest time, I’ve been carrying a lot of trauma and tension anytime I’m around east Asian folks (multiplied a hundred fold for anyone who speaks any Chinese dialect). I started going to therapy to face this, but my therapist does not speak any Chinese dialect, so I’ve felt limited in terms of how far I could explore my trauma and fears. Reaching out to you was the culmination of dealing with years of repression about who I am, and I’m really glad and grateful that I had the opportunity to play with you.
Hearing Mandarin used in session was really overwhelming for me–in a good way. I’ve been facing away from my family for so long that Mandarin is becoming increasingly harder for me to remember and speak well, but while I have a lot of trauma tied to growing up as a trans person in a not so accepting family, I still feel a draw toward home and for me, home includes growing up Chinese in a predominantly Chinese community. I think part of the reason I reached out to you specifically was a desperation to connect with that side of me while being fully connected to all of my identities (femme/queer/trans/kinky). I’m proud of myself for taking the risk of being fully open, but I am also appreciative of the space you made for me because I don’t know if I would have gotten the same type of healing experience in any other way.
I am especially thankful for the amount of care you put in into reading me. I was pushing myself to communicate when things were uncomfortable in a bad way, and while I definitely think I still have more work to do in that respect, I’m grateful that you were watching and checking in the whole time. Some highlights of the session for me were that it felt delightfully queer (I liked calling you daddy and that I simultaneously felt safe enough to be called girl), learning that I liked getting beat up, having you rub your spit into me, getting face slapped, being blindfolded, kissing your boots, getting spanked, having my hair pulled– pretty much everything actually. I thoroughly enjoyed the whole session and hope I get the chance to session with you again!
All the best,
k 10.4.2019
Hi Daddy,
I’ve started writing this multiple times.
Physical inventory:
Feet – mmmm. A delicious tenderness walking today. Definitely some sensitivity and tightness. I enjoyed my walk today 😉
Balls – some tenderness on left side. Other than that, there isn’t much soreness.
Cock – mmm – very tender skin with some abrasions and light brusing.
Other – arms and shoulders tender. upper abs are quite sore.
Now for the fun stuff:
Thank you for an amazing time. It always takes me some time to process. A perfect example is that it took me until today to realize that the abrasions on my cock were actually from your boots! Having you standing on my cock like that was amazing. I have to say that any disappoint I had was not with your or the activities. It was with myself. Though I do realize that it has been a long time since I have played to the level. I was worried during and even after that your perception of me was one of overselling what I was into.
Holy cow, the bastinado. It took me a bit to be able to relax into (sounds weird talking about relaxing while being hurt) However, once I was able to just absorb, I floated with the pain and allowed the tide to flow. When you first said 50 strokes, my mind’s response was “Fuck, I can’t take that.” However, you nailed it.
The cbt work was exquisite. I was frustrated with my own body. I’m not sure what was going on with my left side.
[…]
I definitely want to push harder on the piss. Smell and taste didn’t bother me. However, when it hit my stomach, I should have been able to fight through it.
I am sure that there are things that I am forgetting. I hope that you enjoyed yourself and that if there is anything you were disappointed that you would let me know. I definitely would like to meet again and explore further, harder, longer.
Sincerely,
j 10.3.2019
Dearest Mistress,
So while it was still fresh on my mind, I wanted to share with you some thoughts from our session and afterwards. First of all thank you, and as I said, I’ll be back. Every time I’m in LA, I’ll be contacting you. I’d like to explore more and more over time.
I’m sore not where you’d expected (abs), I guess because I’ve been doing a lot of ab work the past few months to get ready for this week. But I’m sore in my butt cheeks, I guess I clenched. A lot. Also my shoulders and then my armpits are sore from straining against the restraints. But the most delicious kind of sore. I’m an athlete, so I love the feeling of muscle soreness and its indication that you’ve really done something. But here, this soreness is the best I’ve ever felt. My nipples are very sore, but in the most wonderful way. I actually hope they stay that way for a few more days. I feel them every time I move in a bra, or even without one. Even wearing nothing, I still feel them when I move. I actually took a photo to share with you earlier today, and I’ll share it with you via twitter. They are much more erect than usual.
I’d wanted to feel all the sensations, and you gave me that. I loved every minute and was sad when it was over. I now know why dogs lean against our legs. That comfort, security, etc. I felt it as I leaned against you. The feeling of your body against me, on me, whatever, was incredibly sensual, and yet so comforting. Thank you for allowing me to touch you as I could, that meant the world.
The catharsis of it was exactly what I hoped it would be. I allowed myself to really let go, which is what I’d hoped to be able to do. I would have to say this was the most special experience of my 51 years of life, honestly. To be able to not care what anyone thought, or what my responsibilities are, or literally anything else, was amazing. Thank you for the time and thought you put into our session, and I look very forward to the next one, and the one after that, and the one after that, etc.
I cannot tell you the treasure this was to me, and the treasure you are to me. Thank you for not liking computer programming. Yours is a gift and you’ve used it beautifully.
Until next time,
b 5.24.2019
Dear An Li,
I have had some time to reflect upon our encounter yesterday, and am still in awe of the masterful way you and L wove together so many elements of her fantasy wishes. It began with you two establishing your dominance, and leaving me at your mercy, for longer than I thought I could bear. Then, the drops of hot wax foreshadowed the other liquid components of my submission. I then was made to drink spit foreshadowing other tastings that would cum later. The two of you took turns having me at your mercy, ending almost to the point of no return over and over again. Then it was time for L to have pleasure before any reward could be offered to me. When it was my turn, I was left in suspense wondering if my time was finally, um, at hand. The end, if it came, was left to the two of you. I needed to show my worth with a successful countdown, and for your joint delight and laughter and to my relief and humiliation I delivered — and you captured it all. Then, for the first time ever, every drop was returned, again, for your delight and laughter. Then there were final golden drops to complete the afternoon — soothing, sprinkling, warm, keeping me in my place beneath you — again for your delight and laughter. We parted once again, as friends, two pleased with having the upper hand and one surprisingly grateful for having served as desired.
—
An Li,
You are a real treasure, a very beautiful person in a field where sensitivity to the unique qualities of an individual is, I think, quite rare. There may be a severe side to you at times (which I did not see) but deep down you are kind and joyful.
Thank you.
j 4.18.19
Mistress,
I just wanted to reiterate how much I enjoyed spending time with you this past Thursday. You truly are incredible. You have it all, beauty, intelligence, great personality, confidence. You were able to push me exactly how I hoped. I will cherish the experience forever.
r 4.13.2019
Hello Mistress. I just wanted to say thank you so much for our session, it was great! At first when I met you I was really nervous meeting someone new but you were awesome! I loved how you had me in the hogtie and gagged. My nipples and balls feel so good yet so sore. But my favorite part was being under your beautiful ass and loved how you called me your bitch. It was fun doing what you wanted me to and not having a choice! It was awesome looking up at you while you had your way. I loved how you were always talking too.
[…] I’ll look out for you again when you come back to Boston.
Thanks again!
t 4.10.2019
Due to a combination of better knowledge of the pro-Domme scene and more disposable income, I’ve recently started branching out to see a number of highly skilled, gorgeous and well known Mistresses. Mistress An Li has risen to the top of my list quickly and convincingly. Knowing She exists has really raised my standards.
This is due to several factors, but I think it starts with true and pure sadism. Its completely clear when I’m sessioning with Her that She’s having a damn good time at my expense. I’m big into CBT and back whipping and She takes to those activities with remarkable enthusiasm, with laughter and bemusement that can’t be faked.
Second she is highly skilled. Impeccable aim with the whip. Incredible toolset of bondage and CBT activities. Remarkably efficient transitions from one torture to the next – it’s usually my own pain tolerance that’s slowing things down. And Uncanny variety and unpredictability in sessions. Most of the time I don’t know exactly what’s coming as She strings me up for the next torment, but I am always confident it’s going to be painful and, paradoxically, a huge a turn on. That last statement is not something to be taken for granted. I often find myself second guessing Dommes or wishing She’d do a little more of this or less of that. With Mistress An Li it has been complete trust since the first ten minutes of our first session.
While one can find the above two attributes in a select few Dommes, Mistress An Li’s communication skills and intelligence really set Her apart. I could already detect this from the material on Her web site and our first email exchanges, but it has become crystal clear during our sessions. She is unique in Her ability to slip in and out of Her role as my Mistress and Tormentor versus someone I can talk with about BDSM, sometimes transitioning within the space of one second. There is no better example than the time we were having an interesting discussion about slaves’ perspectives on ballbusting (and I thought the session was essentially over) when She swooped in for a huge sucker punch to my balls that had me writhing on the floor for the next two minutes. We’ve talked about our childhood BDSM fantasies and experiences, developments in the pro-Domme scene, and just how crazy and wonderful it is that there are people like me who crave pain meted out by Beautiful Women, and Beautiful Women like Her who equally enjoy meting it out.
I’m so appreciative of Her.
z 12.6.2018
Miss An li,
I apologize for not sending this sooner .
i have been out of the country for the last month and a half..during that time i have had much time to think about the session we had together at the end of march.
i feel that i must tell You that You far exceeded my expectations you are perfection.
Being under you control was absolutely what a groveling little 3 hole gurl needed. You used me like the lowly slut i yearn to be so effectively. The sounding You gave me was the best…..clearly your well versed in this practice. next time I hope you go BIGGER. A girl can dream can’t she?
So thank you for helping me unleash my inner sub slut. You were my first.. 🍒
j 6.17.2018
Hi Mistress An Li,
Sorry it’s taken so long for me to write.
On the whole I did really enjoy our (well my) session x I asked you to push my limits and you did whilst NEVER taking it too far.
The first thing I’ll say is you are so amazingly beautiful in real life, definitely more than your pictures would suggest (and they made you look stunning), I thought this from the moment you opened the door. You were right, I couldn’t take my eyes off you so when you covered my eyes it was an amazing sort of torture.
For me it was really intense, very different from anything I’ve ever experienced before! Maybe because it was in a proper playspace, maybe because of what you did to me?!?!
I’m pretty quiet during sessions but enjoyed how you talked to me throughout.
I’m not really sure what happened to me at the beginning, […] You really calmed me down after feeling VERY light headed in that first bondage position which incidentally I really loved before I had a moment!!!
I loved being dressed up and made to be your play thing, I would have loved to have continued that had I not gone wonky.
You certainly pushed my limits which is what I asked for but at no time did I feel unsafe, I always felt like whilst you were 100% in charge, you completely respected what I could take and what I couldn’t. I guess that is one of the things I was worried about before meeting you.
[…]
[…] Once you freed my arms even though….., you made me feel comfortable yet under your complete command.
The electricity I really liked after you changed from that first implement.
What I really loved was the spitting and when I was made to worship your feet and body. That was amazing and I’ve thought about that many times since. It goes without saying that I loved the spanking though may have liked a bit more.
The most intense moments which I loved the most were when you came so close to me and looked deep into my eyes before making me drink your spit or slapping my face, that was amazing, cathartic and the highlight of our time.
As for the foot and body worship, that was sooo good.
All in all, the session was amazing, you catered to my likes, you pushed my limits and made me try new things whilst always making me feel just the right side of too much.
Thank you, our time together was just what I wanted, I’d 100% visit you again and will next time I’m in town x
As i kneel before the computer to write these woefully insufficient words to describe my gratitude and joy, i keep replaying each moment with You, and i long – ache – to thank and praise You. So grateful that You allowed me to gaze upon Your beauty – perfection from head to toe. So thankful that You coated me with Your spit, blessing my entire body – making me meaningful from that which You casually, playfully, or forcefully discard. So grateful that You made sure all my senses were consumed by Your spit. my eyes remain crusty, my every breath smells You, my ears somewhat plugged longs for the sound of Your voice, my body sticky, my lips, mouth, and tongue sore from the gag yet moistened by You and eager to sing Your praises.
And You were beyond generous to allow me to clean up the toys and to transform me into a walking trash can with the dirty paper towels after the session. Plus, of course, You allowed me to chauffeur You to the session and then to lunch with Your Friend. How grateful i feel – and also sorry that i was not of any further use to You both.
Hope You are enjoying a delightful visit and tasty lunch – and You know of my adoration and gratitude. You are truly amazing, completely awe-inspiring, Goddess. Thank YOU very, very, very much!
Your grateful spittoon
z 11.24.2017
Hello Lovely Mistress An Li,
I’ve been meaning to thank you for our sesion on the 14th of this month and am finally getting to it.
You were beyond amazing. you’d be surprised that even among the most well known there are few that truly embrace domination and punishment the way you do. I really want to thank you for not letting me back out of getting my balls beat by you. It is the fear, pain and suspense that bring a slave to life. You were absolutely masterful. You and Goddess T** are the only ones I have met so far that truly understand the art and mental aspects of ball busting.
Even though a full meal wasn’t in the cards, I truly revel in the joy I could see that you take in using a slave as your toilet. Of course I will need to return for another opportunity at being fed a full meal. I don’t think I even need to request a no mercy, forced full consumption session. At least I’m fairly certain of the no mercy part.
Anyway it is a dream come true to be brutally used by such a stunningly beautiful Woman such as yourself. And the joy you show in your work makes it absolutely amazing.
Thank you so very much.
toilet j 6.24.2017
I just wanted to say a final thank you for the session on Saturday. The bastinado was incredibly intense. I was able to take a lot more bastinado punishment than I would have imagined. And I was not expecting to have my soles whipped with such a long single tail. But I loved watching you as you cracked that whip on my soles. So cruel. I was able to walk like normal at work today. But with each step I was reminded of how cruel you were to my feet.
I want to apologize though for not being a good full toilet session. I know you said you like having a guy eat your shit. Thinking about having your shit pass thru the body of your slave. Next time I need to keep my mouth open like a good toilet. Not some honey bucket with the seat down. And yes I would do a full toilet session again. So humiliating. But I liked seeing how much you enjoyed getting to shit on me.
But great session. Only wish I could have had more time to lick, suck, and massage your delicious feet. Will have to submit at your feet again some time.
Thanks, and enjoy the rest of your Seattle vacation.
j 4.10.2017
I know you don’t want to discuss your “hidden secret” plans, and that just perfect. Your actions speak to me. When you said that “…..by the end of the year..” you were determined to fist me, that tells me enough. Thank you . Also this last session showed me …… you are willing to go deep with me … ( and of course I don’t mean physically). I am grateful for that and your skills which includes your compassion. I wasn’t expecting that you would want to and be able to work with me on the deep levels that only some of those in your profession work with –which, in my opinon, and from my reading, has been the intention for a few thousand years. I am really very grateful. And you are serious about your work in the most joyful way — I don’t know what else to say but thanks. And you are very gentle with how you handle my resistance — you know how to relate with me. I hope that you get as much out of our working together as I do.
k 3.9.2017
You are South-Philly-Tough!
Our recent session was intense and thrilling. You are so creative and genuine, i love Your mind and words. Your treatment was fierce, but delivered skillfully and with empathy and care, I’m so grateful to have met You and to be in s/D relationship with You!
[…]
I look forward to our next encounter with great desire and anticipation.
r 11.24.2016
Mistress,
I wanted to write a quick thank you note, not so sure I was making sentences after the session last night. That was an amazing scene you created, I haven’t felt that “broken” in quite a long time and to achieve that on a first meeting is astonishing. I could run down the list of what was great, but really there wasn’t a moment I can think of where I would say I wish it went different. All I wanted was to look up at you and see you smile back in approvement.
I don’t know if you have some sort of notification list of when you travel, but I would love the opportunity to see you again during a future trip.
Thank you so, so much for last night. I didn’t know how much I was in need of that.
Warmly,
J 11.19.2016
Highly recommend Mistress An Li, especially for someone new to the dominatrix scene. The first thing that struck me about Mistress Li is her professionalism and attention to detail, which is something I really appreciate as a professional myself. All my questions were answered, everything was prompt and above board, and the execution of the session itself felt very upscale, safe and sanitary. You can tell she takes great pride in providing a wonderful experience.
As far as what took place, well couldn’t be happier. Mistress Li addressed everything we had discussed with a great attitude and a gleam in her eye. She has wonderful, dangerous eyes that left me dripping the entire session. I had some personal goals of things which I had never experienced with a partner. Although my body didn’t want to give in at first, Mistress Li took the time and made it submit after an extended effort. As she forced me open my body instantly shuddered and I was reduced to a quivering mess, now completely in her control.
Thank you Mistress Li.
m 5.30.2016
Mistress An Li,
Thank you for today. You reminded me who i am and why i enjoy serving in general, and now You in particular. i felt safe to explore masochism and slavery in your very capable hands. Your energy was amazing throughout our time and connecting our gazes sincerely drew you within me. i am proud of the marks i am wearing today. They will fade over time but the fond memories will not.
[…]
You have a beautiful smile, inviting lips, a magnificent derriere and a devious mind. You are total package.
submissively,
b 5.9.16
Hi Mistress An Li,
Just wanted to thank you for the session we had in DC a few weeks ago. I have never been as humiliated and degraded in my whole life as when you had me tied down and literally used me as your toilet. The contrast between being unattainably close to a beautiful Asian woman, and what I was actually receiving in my mouth, was both torturous and lovely at the same time. Thank you for using me and I hope that you will visit DC again soon.
Thanks,
M 5.8.16
Hi Mistress An Li,
Thanks for the super awesome time yesterday. It’s definitely one of the best sessions that I’ve had in years!
[…]
Enjoy the rest of your trip, be well, and definitely be sure to come back so that we get to experience round two!!
Cheers!!!
L 5.1.2016
As a humiliation freak, I have been enjoying Mistress An Li’s clips for months and they stirred me into finally arranging a session with this Asian dynamo. Setting it up was easy. The Mistress was accessible and communicative, first through email then via phone. I dislike being predisposed of a session because expectations can bring disappointment but short of bad chemistry, I just knew it was going to be good. The exchanges gave me the impression of a very bright, intuitive, genuine Domme who puts herself completely into her work.
A couple of short days after initial contact, I was at a high end dungeon in the arts district of downtown LA with the Mistress. She is very attractive with a luscious, curvy figure, highlighted by a world class derriere. I am an ass lover and Mistress An Li’s is absolutely exquisite. Her manner is efficient, confident, in control which was really promising. I had detailed my interests in emails – smothering, face slapping, spitting, bullying, verbal humiliation – so there wasn’t the need for a long conversation. She inquired about my limits both physical and emotional. I told Her I prefer to relinquish control and put my trust into her judgment which brought a wicked little grin to her face and a snappy, “Good!”
A safe word was provided, nonetheless, then it started. All of the above were addressed and what is so refreshing is how Mistress An Li prosecuted my fetishes on Her terms. She wasn’t simply going through the motions but it felt like she was exploiting my desires for her purposes, with fluidity, crispness and spontaneity. That’s a huge turn on. I have been sessioning with professional Mistresses for 30 years and have become somewhat jaded. Way back when, I thrived on the adrenaline of being pushed to the edge of uncertainty which hasn’t happened in years. It did that night. Mistress An Li actually sparked that delicious submissive fear that has eluded me in sessions for years and she knew just how far to push. This Mistress is the most talented face slapper who’s impact I have ever had the privilege of receiving. The result speaks for itself:
I just wanted to express my sincere appreciation for an incredible call last night. I have never experienced a cyber session before and I must tell you that I am still thinking about how perfect it all was. First of all, you are an amzing beauty. However, your beauty is clearly equaled by your intellect. You knew exactly what to say to get totally into my head! You used all the key findom buzz words whch made me twitch with excitement. Thank you Princess!
s 9.17.2015
Hi An Li,
I just wanted to thank you for one of the most fun sessions I have ever had. Everything flowed along perfectly. You made me feel very vulnerable to the point where I could do nothing about it. I just loved being in your control. I loved it when you tied up my cock and balls and tugging on them whenever you felt like it. The heels you wore looked perfect on you. I just loved the thin pointed heel. And the thong you wore really accentuate your nice legs and ass. Thank you so much for coming to norcal to give me the chance to session with you. I hope I was a good slave to you……
Thanks,
B 8.28.2015
Good morning Mistress. Writing to say how much I enjoyed serving you. Thank you. It was one of the best sessions I’ve ever had, you were amazing, very skillful and even better looking in person than in your gorgeous photos. If I could afford to I would serve you often, in the meantime I am saving up…
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